perfectionist? Pffff

making things perfect is extremely hard. I just spent like 30 minutes recording a guitar part to get every part of it perfect. I want everything to be ABSOLUTELY PERFECT!! FRUSTRATION!!!11 my eyelids are trying to hard to shut my eyes BUT I REFUSE TO GIVE IN!!! ok well maybe im going to give in. night!<3

Things around here seem to be falling apart daily then being put back together. I just have to laugh about it now. Why couldn't it have happened when i was younger and couldn't see the complete childish way they act, when i couldn't see the bullshit? I am going to sleep now. nightynight. <3

sleep sucks.

It really does. Too much running through my head lately. Seems like Iv been stuck in a rut with my mind. Been in a bad mood lately. Everything irritates me one way or another. Either everyone around me is being selfish, horrible people or I'm just trying to see the worst in them. Lately I haven't really seen a lot in people iv particularly liked. Maybe I'm just straying away from it all. Maybe its just my mind being tired and worn down from thinking all day lol. going to try and sleep again. Been having baddd broken sleep lately and elaborate fucked up dreams. My dreams haven't really had any significance on my life lately or my thoughts. Just random fucked up adventures. paaaasssinnnggggout <3

A place I was today. Seemed like another planet. I liked it. Felt epic. I'm tired. I want to do stuffff but my mind wont let me. telling me to get the fuck in that bed and sleep. so many things i cant control with my body. it kinda bothers me. Oh well. OH WELL. . . .. . ... I always feel weird and panic-y when im this tired. I hate it. always feels like something is really wrong but nothing really is. arg. im going to try and sleep. I KNOW il feel better when I wake up. laterrrr. <3

Dream

I had some weird dream where I was in college or something but I couldn't find my dorm. This went on for 20 minutes then some other stuff happened and I woke up feeling weird and fucked up. Dreams suck sometimes when they're good and you wake and realize your back in the shit.

Direction.

Funny how people perceive their problems and life. Funny how you perceive it. Everything is different to everyone. No one will ever see the things you do. Cherish them, enjoy them. Don't worry.
But in the end would it be worth it? Would it be worth all the worrying and hassle? Probably not. But that's the part of the fun. Worrying is just a bad word for the unknown. You can perceive the unknown as a burden or a great opportunity. To do what though? Anything you make it. The future is now. The future is right now.


Welcome to my mind <3. Hope you enjoy your short stay.

Don't tell me.

Don't tell me. I don't want to know. I want empty parts. I want to think everything is okay. Leave the details, who needs them anyway? You have everything in the world to look forward to. Don't let it go to waste.

Hello, goodbye.

time to pass out now. goodnight <3